Charlie Sunshine by Fred DeVecca

They call me Charlie Sunshine. I spread sunshine everywhere I go. I like to please everybody.

She hired me to kill her husband. 

She was smart; she read me immediately. She spotted me as the sort of guy who could kill a husband. I had done it before; not a husband specifically, but yeah, I had killed a few humans before. 

And she also spotted me as the kind of guy who likes to please.

So, maybe hired is a strong word. 

She asked me to kill her husband. No money was exchanged. But she knew I would accept. She knew that’s the kind of guy I am.
So that’s what I set out to do that cold, raw night, the first such night that winter.
***                                                
I didn’t know the husband. Hell, I didn’t know her. But she was the kind of woman most any man would kill for.  It was the way she touched me. I mean literally touched me, her fingers gentle on my shoulder, then my arm, then my fingers. Then to my chest. She had this kind, soft smile all the time. And she had a tiny gap between her upper front teeth. That drives me crazy

And, yeah, she touched me in other ways too. Internally I mean. She touched my heart and my soul. I guess you could say I fell in love with her.

It’s hard to ask someone to kill for you in a soft way. But that’s what she did.

That’s why I said yes.  That and the fact that I like to please. 
***                                                            
I found Jack, the husband, at the same bar I had found her. Must be their place – very sweet.

I bought him a beer, the quickest way to warm up to a stranger in a bar, and he sipped it thirstily. We talked about sports, the weather, old movies, everything but religion and politics. I was starting to like the guy. It’s hard not to like a guy when you’re drinking together. Eventually, we even got to sex. I mean discussing sex, at least obliquely. 

“Susan hired you to kill me,” he said.

I had not prompted him or given him a clue. He just blurted it out.  And I was clever enough to figure out who Susan referred to, 

I told the truth. “No.”

“Well, she asked  you to kill me. Right?”

I couldn’t lie. I don’t lie. I kill, but I don’t lie. “Yes,” I said.

“Yeah. That’s what she does. She’s asked other guys before. They all fall in love with her and say yes but none of them ever follow through. As you can see.

“Are you going to?”

I had to think about this. I wouldn’t have gotten this far if I didn’t think it was a possibility, but I was still uncertain. 

I replied “maybe.”

“How about I hire you to kill her instead? And I do mean hired. I can pay you. Big time. Up front.”

He pulled out a thick wad of green currency. The top bill was a Franklin, a c-note, a hundred. He peeled off a bunch of them; he didn’t count them and neither did I. This hardly reduced the thickness of that fat wad at all. Then he gave the newly peeled roll to me.

Even if they were all Franklins, how many could there be in that roll? Twenty? Thirty? 

What? Three thousand max? That’s not a lot when you’re talking murder.

What the hell. I accepted it. I had nothing else going on. 

I guess that means we had a deal.

And he didn’t even touch me. And he didn’t have a gap between his teeth. 

And I didn’t even fall in love with him. 

But, as I said, I’m Charlie Sunshine. I like to please everybody.
***                                                 
The next night at closing time I found the two of them together, at their bar. How convenient! It was kind of a dive and it was crowded so I got lost in the humanity and floated around all night without them seeing me. But as it got later and the throngs thinned out, no one was left but them, me, and a couple obviously plastered barflies who were drifting about in their own worlds. 

They were sitting at the bar as I walked up to them. They both, separately, surreptitiously, gave me a knowing nod, not quite a wink, and a subtle smile. 

Geez, they were both total slimeballs, but I was in love with one of them. 

Me? Hell, I’m an even worse slimeball. I was going to kill one of them. The only question was which one.

I walked out the side door which led to the damp dark alley outside. They followed. 
***                                                      
It was another raw chilly night. No one else was around. We stood under the fire escape, looming over us like a gallows ready to spring. 

They were each grinning with their own private certainty of what was about to occur. And their grins only spread wider and more certain when I pulled out my cheap but sufficient derringer. 

I pointed it at them. They were standing close together so who could tell which one I was actually pointing it towards. Not either of them and, truth be told, neither could I. 

I pointed it at Susan and pulled the trigger; a direct hit in the chest. She fell to the ground. 

I was three thousand dollars richer but didn’t feel very good about it. Jack had made me kill the love of my life. 

So then I shot him. He fell to the ground.

That gun only holds two rounds or I may have turned it onto myself. 

I was the worst slimeball of all. But, hell, I’m Charlie Sunshine. I like to please everybody.

© 2026 Fred DeVecca

About the author:
​Fred DeVecca has written, directed, produced and acted in four films and has managed a revival  movie house. He has been a Morris dancer, a federal bureaucrat, a novelist, and a free-lance non-fiction writer. He regularly vanishes into long silent meditation retreats, enjoys swimming and walking his long-haired German Shepherd. He lives in Shelburne Falls, MA.